Guest post by R
Well, two streaks actually. But more on that later.
I've been very fortunate these last 11 years: I've managed to traverse these eventful years only having heard 2 Spice Girls songs along the way (and these two songs, which I've managed to block out, were forced upon me while I was in a taxi in Russia and had no choice).
I'm most proud of my ability to avoid hearing that gawd-awful "Tell me what you want, what you really really want" song. Now that's not to say that I hadn't heard snippets of it; I had. But never more than about 5 seconds--15 if the remote or radio dial was out of reach.
This streak tragically ended about 2 weeks ago when I was shopping at Safeway at night. I was enjoying a peaceful, quiet stroll away from the screaming newborn at home. As I walked down the noodles/hamburger helper isle, a creepy feeling came over me, the vapid, cacophonous highly-processed musical stylings of the Spice Girls started, and I realized that fate and I were finally going to meet.
As my ears started twitching and I fought off the gag reflex I calmed myself down: "Oh well," I said to myself, "at least I've managed to make it this long. And it's not a complete loss: I've still managed to avoid that damned 'If you want to be my lover, first you got to get with my friends' song." But I was cut off in mid-thought: turns out the "really really want" song and the "get with my friends" song are the same song. I wasn't prepared for this unfortunate turn of events. How could Safeway do this to me? I'm a good guy, trying to love my kids and do the right thing. Plus, who the hell still plays Spice Girls these days, much less their 2 worst songs (which, as noted, turned out to be one super-terrible song)?
So my night was ruined. But things will be OK: my streak of not hearing any songs by "Hannah Montana" or from "High School Musical" is still firmly in tact.
4 comments:
Oh do we miss the R. Thank goodness, as the Spice Girls say, "friendship never ends". Thanks for a great laugh.
A truly frightening expreience...I think the remedy is to watch as many consecutive hours of "Flight of the Concords" as you can.
In a recent turn of events, I got FOTC from Netflix! I still haven't started yet, but perhaps it is just what R needs to take his mind off the present ordeal.
You'll have to tell me what you think of Flight of the Concords. I think it's hilarious.
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